lilwhiskey(s): July 2010

Having a tea party with her Barbies

I have very few hobbies. Before Hailey, I am not really sure what I did with my time...work I guess. If I listed my hobbies now, I would say they are internet shopping, playing Barbies, exercising, cooking, and reading. I haven't exercised in months, consider Hamburger Helper to be "cooking", and don't have very much time to read anymore - but I do love to read. Before I had Hailey I bought a bunch of parenting books and learned a lot from them. My favorites from that time are Happiest Baby on the Block (which really did not apply to Hailey at all, but I have already found useful with Aubrey) and Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child - that book is amazing and I recommend it to anyone who has kids and will listen to me. As Hailey grew and developed I ordered and read more books...Touchpoints (it was ok) The Strong Willed Child (completely disagree with this philosophy), and The Happiest Toddler on the Block ( pretty good). In general, Hailey is a very good little girl and fairly manageable, but she is the queen of manipulation and negotiation and will try to "win" to the extreme that she doesn't even really want whatever it is that she is trying to win by the time she feels she succeeds or just gives up. After we returned from our St Thomas vacation she went thru a period where she just did not want to do anything that she was supposed to without a fight. It was exhausting and we had no idea what to do with her...so to Amazon.com I went for some book shopping. A while back my friend Andrea who is a school psychologist mentioned the book 1-2-3 Magic to me, so after research I bought it and started to read it. I also strategically placed it in the reading material basket in the bathroom...

That is the last time I will do that!

Jon started to read the book and fell in love with it. In the past, I read the books, and then tell him what they say. Then I complain how he never reads the books. I will never complain again - I prefer it that way. This book is now his guide to all discipline, and while it works - like magic - there have been many moments where I want to smack him with that book!

I can't relay in this post all of the wonderful points in 123 Magic, so I won't even try...but it is really easy and works well. It addresses "stop" behaviors, which are easy and start behaviors which are more difficult. Jon chooses to use a kitchen timer to motivate Hailey for the start behaviors. The timer's clicking irritates me, but she seems to like it. However, she is so smart she figured out quickly that she could turn the timer to the end and make it "ding" and we were so amazed with her 3 yr old ingenuity we couldn't help but laugh and give her what she was waiting for.

For the most part the book is close to how we choose to discipline anyway, but helped us tweak some areas where we were not very effective - primarily, we talk too much. We want to explain everything to Hailey like she is a little adult and forget that she is 3.

Somewhere, hiding deep beneath my postpartum hormones, I am happy we both read it and are using it, but I think maybe changing our parenting style the same week we brought a new baby home and had a bazillion visitors might have been a little bit too much change for the munchkin. She responded just fine, but it caused a lot of tears for this mommy...I can't stand to see her unhappy!

Things are definitely smoother around here as far as Hailey is concerned, but having both Mommy and Daddy at home for the last 2 1/2 weeks has been a big change for her. I am nervous for Jon to return to work next week, but sure I will adjust.

I mentioned in my previous post that I had a doctor appointment last Thursday, and that I would update if anything interesting developed. Well, it wasn't interesting then, but it is now !

At that appointment I was dilated to 3 cm and both the doctor and I were very happy with that. She said that she expected that my water would break or labor would begin before my scheduled delivery on July 13th. I was excited, but nervous because I had big plans with Hailey for the weekend, and I didn't want to disappoint

her!

I only worked a few hours on that Friday and after we nap time we went to Busch Gardens. Our extremely hot weather had let up that day and it was beautiful outside. We walked all over and I even rode a few kiddie rides, but most importantly we saw fireworks, and were able to check that off of Haileys to-do list.

The next morning we got an early start and made it to the zoo for Member Only Hours. It was fantastic - the animals were all active and there were hardly any people there. We walked and walked, and after that we went to the mall to look for sneakers for Jon (his are over two years old and his toes are escaping the fronts, but he can't seem to find any he likes) and walked some more. That afternoon we went to see Toy Story 3, which was very good but slightly traumatic for Hailey, who really does not like to throw anything away.

On Sunday, the 4th of July, we started the day with a walk around the development and then went over to the park and rented a paddle boat to go fishing with. I paddled that boat all over the "lake" ( a word I use loosely, considering I grew up near Lake Erie) That night I started having stronger contractions,but they didn't intensify and would stop if I switched positions.

Monday morning brought more contractions, but I called the hospital and they told me to take some tylenol and drink some water...so I followed their directions, and then we went to Water Country. I decided to try out a water slide, and other than a strange look from the teenage life guard at the top of the kiddie slide and my inability to get OFF the tube at the bottom of th

e slide, we had a great time, but still no baby!

The point of the story above is that we tried and tried to help the baby along, but to no avail, and on Tuesday we all went to work. My contractions were definitley getting more annoying on Tuesday, but I was still able to get them to stop or at least ease up, which meant (according to my self diagnosis with the aid of the internet) that they were false contractions. Tuesday was always meant to be my last day of work and its a good thing!

Hailey was very excited that Mommy didn't have to go to work on Wednesday. We spent the morning hanging out at the house and watching TV, and then we went to Target to buy a new Barbie doll. We ended up with three barbie dolls and a Barbie Corvette, and my contractions weren't bad at all, especially if I was moving. We went home to eat lunch and were sitting on the couch getting ready for nap time, when Hailey used my belly as a ledge to help her stand up. I was in the middle of explaining why she couldn't do that when I felt the baby move and a giant whoosh feeling that I cannot describe and will never forget - my water broke! To say the

least, Hailey was a little freaked out and didn't understand why mommy "spilled" her water. I picked up my cell phone to call Jon, but couldn't get through to him, so I called my friend Candie. It had only been about 2 minutes, but I was pretty sure that I was not going to be able to drive Hailey anywhere and get myself to the hospital. Fortunately Candie was in her car with her three kids and immediately headed my direction. I then called Jon's squadron, who also did not really know where he was, but they connected me to one of the guys who assured me that they would find him and send him home. At this point I am still kind of leaking water, Hailey is following me around trying to figure out what is going on, and my contractions are intensifying, but because I had been having so many and for so long, I wasn't too worried. I called Labor and Delivery to tell them that we would be in shortly and told Hailey to go get a bag and pack up some of her toys to take with her to Candies. She thought that was a great idea and scampered off to get the biggest bag she could find from under the sink and packed up her new Barbies and Barbie car. Candie was here in under 10 minutes and took care of getting Hailey ready to go and then helped me get my stuff together...I was still having trouble getting connected to Jon but had received a text message that he was on his way home and he got here and changed and we were off to the hospital. My contractions were definitely getting worse and I was scared, but knew I would be calmer once we got to the hospital...and I was for about 3 minutes.

The rest is kind of a blurry whirlwind. Later I looked at my phone to see what time I had called Candie - it was 11:47. I also remem

ber looking at the clock in my car in the parking lot when we got to the hospital and it read 12:25. Aubrey's official birth time is 1:24. In between 12:25 and 1:24 I managed to go from calmly walking in and getting weighed ( I was still making jokes at this point...told the girl I didn't need to be weighed, that the answer is ALOT), being checked by a nurse who immediately called for a midwife and an ultrasound machine who verified that I was fully dilated and the baby was breech, to being rushed to surgery and having a c-section with half of my normal clothes on, as there was no time to change into proper hospital attire. Fortunately they were able to give me a spinal block and not use general anesthesia, so I was able to be awake. It was a bit scary and a lot painful, but it all turned out just fine and we have a 6lb 15oz baby girl. I am recovering from this c-section much faster than I did the first one and was up walking by 11 PM that night. Its been 5 days now, and I still have a lot of pain, but am doing well. Aubrey had a weight check yesterday and was 6lbs 9 oz and is doing well. She likes to spit up a lot but is pretty good sleeper so far, and likes to be held and talked to.

All of these pictures are out of chronological order, but if I spend anymore time trying to fix them, no one will even care to read this blog...so just start at the bottom!